I actually don't know why I find it so hard to deal with my own issues. It doesn't take a lot of effort, it doesn't take a lot of brains. I just need to find the courage to face up to it and stop running away from my self. But it is a heavy burden because I don't have the bravery to do so. It is pathetic how I lose myself in love. I lean on it and shape my life around it. When it all falls apart, a part of me dies as well. This damage is permanent and it goes on forever. Most probably why I'd prefer to do things alone. It is easier to be alone. I don't have to open myself up to get hurt again, and I wouldn't feel compelled to make anyone happy.